Firsts! Popeye’s First Bath

There are lots of firsts for a newborn, in fact, everything is a first. First breath, first sound, first outfit, first poop in first outfit. The list goes on.

So the first bath is a momentous occasion and a perfect opportunity to embarrass future-Popeye. I’m picturing him mouthing off around his buddies when he’s 12 or 13 and me busting out this video to set him straight.

Is it bad to already be stocking up on ammo to use as a parenting crutch way down the road?

Things were going swimmingly the first few days so we decided to throw a wrench in the proceedings to spice things up. We figured a newborn bath would be an ideal way to spend a Saturday evening (action! drama! tears!) plus our baby might even come out of it a little cleaner. Everybody wins!

If you watched the video above then you can see that everything started out pretty well. As well as can be expected when introducing a brand new human to a brand new experience. There were some wails and flails but nothing out of hand. He actually responded very good to face dabbing and looked like he might even pull through without too much scarring.

Then he was removed from the water and let out a scream that was 2 octaves higher than any sound he has made before or since. After that he was wrapped in a comfy towel and it appeared that the worst was well behind us.

But the worst was brewing.


Little Popeye pooped himself so much and so thoroughly that the once white towel became a lovely greenish-yellow. Luckily his poop does not yet contain the olfactory aspect or things could’ve turned uglier than the aforementioned towel. He was quickly cleaned up and appeared to have forgiven us and put the whole ugly ordeal in the past.

Thanks buddy!


  • Ahh, parenting! We waited DAYS to give our baby a bath. Surprisingly, we weren’t putting it off out of laziness, but fear and dread. How do you bathe a baby? He’ll be slippery. What if we drop him? We were also scared to death that he was going to catch a “chill”, which is funny because we live in southern California. When we finally did get up the nerve, it was no big deal. Geez…,

    • Dan Poore says:

      After this first time when he screamed and pooped all over, the bathing has been a breeze… well except for that one time when the water was too warm and he glared at me.

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